Saturday, July 10, 2004
Roscoe P. Coltrane
Music: Led Zeppelin-The Battle of Evermore
Has anyone here every watched that classic redneck-sploitation television series 'The Dukes of Hazard'?
Of course you have. Bo and Luke Duke. Boss Hog. Hot ass Daisy Duke. Uncle Jesse. Waylon Jennings voice over.
But lets not forget one of my favorite television characters of all time: Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane.
Everytime I hear his laugh, I nearly piss myself from laughter. You know what I'm talking about. It kind of sounds like 'A-Kew, Kew, Kew' or something like that.
If only those Hollywood suits would have had the vision to create a show around THAT character. Now that would have been sweet.
Fuck that dumb deputy Enos. I'd bring in Don Knotts to reprise his role as Barney Fife. Barney's tired of Andy's backwoods morals bullshit and moves to Hazard County. Boss Hog cuts Barney in on his action. Roscoe gets jealous and challenges Barney to a knife fight. Little does Roscoe know that Barney Fife is not a mother fucker that likes to be trifled with. End season one on that big cliffhanger.
Now that is innovative. Hell, it would have beat shows like 'The Shield' to the punch by a couple of decades.
Ah well,..copyright issues would be a problem I'm sure....Hollywood pussies.
Speaking of Don Knotts, I'll have to tell you the story of when I (jokingly) claimed he was my real dad.
That story is for another blog
'A-Kew, Kew, Kew!'
Has anyone here every watched that classic redneck-sploitation television series 'The Dukes of Hazard'?
Of course you have. Bo and Luke Duke. Boss Hog. Hot ass Daisy Duke. Uncle Jesse. Waylon Jennings voice over.
But lets not forget one of my favorite television characters of all time: Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane.
Everytime I hear his laugh, I nearly piss myself from laughter. You know what I'm talking about. It kind of sounds like 'A-Kew, Kew, Kew' or something like that.
If only those Hollywood suits would have had the vision to create a show around THAT character. Now that would have been sweet.
Fuck that dumb deputy Enos. I'd bring in Don Knotts to reprise his role as Barney Fife. Barney's tired of Andy's backwoods morals bullshit and moves to Hazard County. Boss Hog cuts Barney in on his action. Roscoe gets jealous and challenges Barney to a knife fight. Little does Roscoe know that Barney Fife is not a mother fucker that likes to be trifled with. End season one on that big cliffhanger.
Now that is innovative. Hell, it would have beat shows like 'The Shield' to the punch by a couple of decades.
Ah well,..copyright issues would be a problem I'm sure....Hollywood pussies.
Speaking of Don Knotts, I'll have to tell you the story of when I (jokingly) claimed he was my real dad.
That story is for another blog
'A-Kew, Kew, Kew!'
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Why y'all gotta be hatin' on my main man Enos? I mean...honestly, how badass you expect him to be with name like that? Considering how hard he must have had it as a lil Enos, growing up in the ghettos of Hazard County, I think you need to cut a dogg some slack, G.
Much Love for Nos Def.
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Much Love for Nos Def.
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